You Can't Make a Horse Drink, but You Can Salt His Oats

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Horses are obstinate. I speak from much expereince. you see, I rode them for many years when I was younger. We learned to ride, saddle, bathe, and generally take care of them. One of the most difficult things I learned to do was cleaning the mud and dirt out of their hooves. Here's how i learned to do it. You placed your shoulder under the front shoulder of the horse, which him to shift weight off the hoof. Then as you straddled his leg, you lifted his hoof off the ground which exposed the bottom of his hoof. You then used a hoof pick. You gently cleaned his hoof, Then repeated this with every hoof each time you rode. Only it wasn't as easy as that. Inevitably, the horse had another plan rather than having his hooves cleaned. He would much rather eat, rest, run the pasture, and a host of other things. Besides that, he can push his 1000 pounds of weight on a 120 pound teenager. It was a wrestling match. I was knocked down, stepped on, bitten, kicked, and spit on. Yeah, you can lead a horse to water, but you sure can't make him drink. Why? Horses are obstinate.

But that never happened with Dan. We called him Dan the man. He took control and finessed that horse to raise his hoof and allow his hoof to be cleaned with no problem. What took me an hour to do, he did in about 5 minutes. He was, after all, Dan the man. What was the difference? He had developed a skill that made it look easy, even when dealing with an obstinate horse.
While I'm not saying that all men are obstinate, I am saying that there are skills to learn to deal when dealing with them. There are skills that can help you teach them to improve your relationship and your family. it can help with dealing with men at your place of work and at school and really with nearly anyone...even obstinate people. You see when you want a horse to drink some water, you can't make him...but you sure can salt his oats. That's where the skill comes in.
The Bible teaches us to salt our speech. You can find these words in the letter to the church in Colosse:

Your speech should always be gracious, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how you should answer each person. (Colossians 4:6, HCSB)

We are given the exhortation to craft our words so they are seasoned and gracious. That is how we can make teachable moments with those we love. How does that work? Just like salting the oats of a horse can him drink water, as obstinate as they are. Salting our speech can also develop a thirst in the person who needs to be influenced so that they can learn to do the right thing as well.
The bushmen in the Kalahari desert have an ingenious way of finding water. It involves salt and baboons. Here's a video that explains it much better than I ever could.

That is the way we want people to,respond to us...not with accusation and force, but with finesse and ingenuity. That's what salting is all about. If you would like to know how you can influence others for their best, here is a worksheet you can download and use that I adapted from Gary Smalley's book Hidden Keys to a Loving Lasting Marriage.
Keep the salt handy!
Pastor Trey Rhodes

Pastor Ivey's Final Sunday at Oceanside Church - Pastor Ivey will be preaching, we will have a special video presentation, and a commisioning service. Also plan to give to his scholarship fund which will go to his Southeastern Seminary tuition.

Dinner on the Grounds Honoring Pastor Ivey and Allie - Bring a side and/or dessert. We'll do the rest. Let's send Pastor ivey and his family off with a great time of fellowship and encouragement.

We need YOUR help with the NEW OC Website - It's the same address, www.MyOceansideChurch.com, but we need you all to search for it multiple times on Google so we can get the count up and move up to the first page like we used to be. THANK YOU!!

New Sermon Series The Cross Was Enough begins Sunday, March 10. The Cross has such power that it is enough to save ALL that come. Plan to attend every exciting service at Oceanside Church.

Palm Sunday Candlelight Service - We will partake of the Lord's Supper together as we remember Jesus' final supper with His disciples. Sunday Night, March 24th, 2013, 7 p.m.

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You Have One Chance at This (and time is not on your side)

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For years we've said things like "Nobody's perfect" or "God gives second chances" or "If at first you don't succeed...try, try again." While all of these comments may be true in theory, truth be told, we can no longer rest on the laurels of God's mercy; we must strive to fulfill His standard as families. Instead of recognizing these principles as God's mercy, we tend to make them excuses.

You see, God has already given us the tools we need with clear instructions on how to use them. God cares deeply for your home and wants it to be all it was intended to be. God never intended for our families to be some sort of cultural experiment that can change year to year or generation to generation.

Our families are the building block of civilization. It is why one of the first things God established was the family in general and marriage in particular. Listen to the words of God Himself:

This is why a man leaves his father and mother and bonds with his wife, and they become one flesh. (Genesis 2:24 HCSB)

The family was established before Israel, before the Church, before government, before any other social organization or governing authority. It was where God, in all of His infinite wisdom, chose to establish the most important priority. Now, we tend to place more emphasis on our jobs, our friends, our politics, or our interests. For whatever reason, we think that all the other things come before our family. It is almost as if we think our families are indestructible. We assume that they will survive without nurture or sustenance. When we do that, it is our loss. As God prioritized, so must we. Otherwise the statistics of child abuse and neglect, divorce, teenage suicide, domestic violence, and the like, will continue to rise.

It is up to you and me to begin to say that we will have a godly, determined, and grace-filled family. The kind of family that those in our culture want to become like. The kind of homes that people come away from with more of God as a part of their lives. Homes where husbands love their wives (Ephesians 5:25). Wives respect their husbands (Ephesians 5:33). Children obey their parents (Ephesians 6:1). A home where grace is in abundant supply (Ephesians 1:6). That is the kind of place God wants us to have.

So, you can see why it is the most important place on earth. We have one chance. Time is not on our side. Start being the kind of home God wants. Begin today.

Pastor Trey Rhodes

Modern Family Series Continues this Sunday - From "Leave it to Beaver’s" Cleavers to "Modern Family’s" Pritchetts, TV producers have been offering us models of what the modern family is for years, but is that what it should be? Many of us have realized neither model works. Let’s be honest, all we really want is a family that works. Families may have changed, but God's principles about the family haven't. Join us at Oceanside Church for a real-life journey into seemingly revolutionary concepts that have worked for thousands of years, and still work today. The style of the modern family may have changed, but the way to have a great modern family hasn’t.

Churchwide Dinner Honoring Pastor Ivey, Allie and their children - On their last Sunday, we will be sending this wonderful family off to seminary with a special service and dinner. Meat will be provided. Please bring cold drinks, a side dish, and dessert. Plan now to attend on Sunday February 24th right after church.

RVGC Video Game competition - 6 p.m. Friday Night February 22. ALL STUDENTS INVITED. If you want to compete, there is a $5 entry for the Super Smash Brothers competition. $75 grand prize. Total purse to be awarded, $150.

 

 

Oceanside Church Online - Did you miss the message this past Sunday? Need some exhortation for the coming week? We've got just what you're looking for. Follow this link to find a message that will touch your heart and encourage your walk at Oceanside Church Online

 

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